MY FATHER TOOK ADVANTAGE OF ME Part Eight and Nine

Out of curiosity, I insisted I must know what was wrong with Faith since I was the major financier of her medical bills. No one was telling me until I stopped bringing money for anything. My mum reluctantly told me she did an abortion and it was not well managed and she had complications. As I talk to you now, your sister’s womb has to be removed to save her life. Immediately I heard this I went blank. After some minutes I asked mum if she revealed who impregnated her. No, she said she doesn’t know who was responsible. Meanwhile the doctor advised we don’t bother her for now until she’s out of the hospital.
I was mad in my spirit, let it not be what I was thinking, I mustered some words to myself. Could it be that dad had also been sleeping with Faith without my knowledge? Faith is a decent girl and she has never told me she had a boyfriend. We talked a lot and I would have known if she was seeing any guy. My reaction got my mum worried but I couldn’t tell her what was going on in my mind. If daddy is responsible for Faith’s pregnancy, I will kill him and kill myself. I assured myself.
My heart was heavy and weak. Why are all these things happening to us alone? O God have mercy on Fowogbade’s family. Grace was gone, mum lost her job, Faith is laying helpless in the hospital, dad’s business had totally collapsed, landlord had given us ultimatum to leave the house, I have become a sex addict, everyone had abandoned us, eating regular food and living a good life is elusive, Christy is at home because of school fees. What is our offense? Why are all these things happening to us at the same time? Who did we offend? What happened to those prayers mum did for the family? God, are you in existence?
When I was left alone with Faith I hugged her passionately to my heart. Dear, I love you and you will live to testify of God’s goodness. I spoke many words of hope to her. Faith, I know who is responsible for your pregnancy! I said and looked straight into her eyes for a long time. Is he the one? She bent her head and tears rolled down uncontrollably. I looked at those tears and I saw betrayal, disappointment, dashed hope, hatred and unexpressed agony. Without a word, I understood those tears. They are tears that spoke volume more than words. Dad had been doing it with Faith too. But why will dad be this wicked? Why did dad wear the garment of an angel but a heart of a monster?
We held ourselves for minutes as we both sob bitterly in each other’s arms. (this is a case of a dad’s involvement, there were instances where an elder brother subjected the younger sisters to sucking his penis until he cums. Hmmm, things are happening – story for another day. They knew it was wrong but couldn’t talk as kids, but today as adults, the whole childhood early experience has contributed to the hatred meted out to him.)
Faith narrated what she has been through in dad’s prison. I thought my case was pathetic but Faith’s own was more terrible. Faith spent two hours telling me how it all started. Dad started sleeping with Faith at age 11. A time she was yet to menstruate. He started by putting his finger in my pant, then he will tell me never to tell anybody. He told me he will kill me if I ever tell anybody. At a time, I couldn’t stand to hear the atrocities my dad had done to us. Mum was the genesis of our problems. She was never available for us when we needed her.
Dad played the role of a father and a mother. Mum made dad’s life miserable because she saw him as an unbeliever. Dad never enjoyed mum’s intimacy hence he found solace in his daughter’s laps. If dad must die, mum should die first. I will take vengeance as I live, I promised myself. I can no longer wait for God’s judgment or the threats of my spirit husband. Their judgment is too slow.

*Part Nine*

 

Faith’s womb was damaged because dad had done abortion for her three times. But how manage I didn’t know all these when it was happening right under my nose? If I accused mum of carelessness, I think I was more careless than her. How can my sister be pregnant for my dad three times without me knowing? She did three abortions and I was not aware? Adenike you’re very stupid and useless, I insulted myself.
I had sat down to weight the consequences of exposing dad and killing him. Killing him seems better. It will clean the mess and save the family name from shame and disgrace. Exposing him will drag the family name to the mud and lives everlasting stigma to our generation. The stain will haunt us all, our lives and our unborn children. Who knows if he had done it with Christy and Grace too? That will be the worst of the blow. Grace was gone but I can find out from Christy if she had been abused by dad too.
I was deep in this though when I slept off. In my brief sleep I had a long dream. In my dream, I sent thugs to kidnap my spirit husband who had been abusing me. They brought him into a thick forest where he was tied, hands and foot. The leader of the gang gave me a gun to shoot him. I took the gun and pulled the trigger and blew his head off.
As soon as I killed him, some police officers surrounded us and took us away. We were thrown behind bars with serious torture. Still in my dream we were charged to court and when the court clerk called my case she said “I hereby call up the case between Miss Adenike Fowogbade and the state”. The judge looked into the file before him and looked at my face, Miss Adenike Fowogbade you were accused of the murder of Mr Temitayo Fowogbade on the 17th of September, are you guilty or not? I had not said a word when the judge pronounced his judgment.
Having been found guilty of this offense of murder you are hereby sentenced to death by……. That was the last thing I heard and the next I saw was that I was thrown into a dark bottomless pit and I was going down endlessly then I woke up. I was so frightened and my body was shaking uncontrollably for minutes. I became restless because I understood the dream. All messages I ever heard on hell fire flashed back in a jiffy.
I tried to pray but to pray but no single word came out of my mouth. I tried crying but my tears were held back. My knees were hitting each other. I lied on the floor for 25 minutes without knowing what to do. The earth was so empty as if rapture had taken place. I looked right and left nobody to talk to. I looked down, the fear of hell gripped me. So I decided to look up to God for help. I felt an invisible presence at my back saying “The prayer of a sinner is an abomination before God”. I picked my Bible but the pages were blank. O God have mercy on me! I know I had gone far away from you but please remember the blood of your Son, Jesus Christ. I wept in bitterness.
Terrible things happened in part 10.
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